Is Not Playing With Your Child Making You Feel Guilty?

“Mom, can you pretend to be Olaf and I will be Anna?”

“Mom, let’s have a pretend tea party!”

“Mom, would you play trains with me”?

…dinosaurs, horses, dolls, butterflies…. The list is endless.

not playing with your child

The day I had my first child I found a true life purpose.

The day I decided to become a stay at home mom was one of the best decisions in my life.

But sometimes there is so much of dinosaurs, fairies, fake cup of teas I can take…Let’s be real – pretending to be a weird creature that concurs the world isn’t something that I particularly wish to do when I get up in the morning.

There are a lot of other things that I truly enjoy doing with my kids such as making diffuser necklaces, learning outdoor activities, making toys, making videos with them, having long talks during evening massages and so much more.

 LOSE the guilt

I know it’s “eating” you. Sometimes I feel humongous guilt too.

But then I remember family systems theory that we studied in college, which basically said that every family is different. How?

lose the guilt

Well, some parents are very “touchy and feely” type, while others are low affection type. But guess what  – it doesn’t matter how you interact with your child as long as there IS a communication with respect, trust, love and understanding.

 Good news is that it doesn’t matter if you play a pretend tea party or pretend to be a dinosaur for weeks, you are still A GOOD PARENT and are raising an AWESOME child.
Oh, and if you DO pretend to be a dinosaur – you still are a good parent and raising an awesome child.
Your most important responsibility as a parent is to provide safe, healthy and nurturing environment for your children. You don’t have to be a constant playmate buddy.

BUT You Still Have To Play…

Some of best memories from my childhood comes when my dad used to play hide and seek with us every Saturday. It was the biggest fun we had  with my brothers. There are only few years until your kids won’t want to play with you anymore and you will miss that. I know I will.

play with me legos

Here are few tips to help you “ease” the play time with your children:

1. Make a schedule for it. I know, some may not like this, but – hey, if you hope for spontaneous playing mood and you are not “the playing kind” that mood won’t come. Or if it comes, it will stay until your child asks you to be a butterfly and fly around the room on one foot.

So set a time. Whether it’s once a day, once a week or even once a month.

That way your child will know that there is a time when mommy will play with them and they won’t be asking you for it all day long.

2. TURN OFF everything around you.

It’s easier to get in the play mood when you don’t have TV on, when your phone isn’t beeping with the latest FB or email updates. Don’t let that full sink dirty dishes get to your either. You will enjoy the play a lot more.

3. Change play location and make it more fun.

4. When you are REALLY not in the mood to play “pretend”, offer your child some fun alternatives that they can’t refuse. These Balloon games are the “winner” in our house on a desperate afternoon.

How about you? Do you play with your kids? Do you enjoy it?

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4 thoughts on “Is Not Playing With Your Child Making You Feel Guilty?”

  1. Andrea

    Sorry I just read your “about me” and realized English is your third language soooo you’re pretty amazing and I feel like a jerk. I apologize! Please delete my previous comment.

    1. Birute Efe

      Andrea, thank you for pointing out the mistake. I really really appreciate you reading my “about me” and coming back to comment! And I will try harder from now on to proof-read my posts before publishing.

  2. Ashita

    Hi! Nice topic but could not read it since your blog is not responsive. Would be nice if I could read on my mobile.

    1. Birute Efe

      Hey, Ashita, thank you so much for coming over. So sorry for site being not mobile. I had technical issues on the blog for few days. It’s fixed now.

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